Happy Hormone For A Not So Happy Heart

I lied when I said it’s nothing.

That all the mockery and accusations are not getting into my skin.

It is creeping, slowly, sticking into my sagging skin and biting every bone, making itself home.

I don’t know if the people around me, which I consider friends are still my friends

When they are all laughing behind my back

I don’t know if it is safe to tell them what I feel or what I know

I don’t really know if I can thrust fall in the crowd

I hear their voices mocking

Their stare–scanning

Looking for something to laugh at

Something to talk behind my back

You have a leader bully

And you guys happen to be in the flock

I share smiles with you

Share my life with you

But knowing how you cooperate with the leader bully

Causes me to step back

And consider who among the flock are my confidant

I see the contempt behind the smile

It hurts to know that no one from the flock stand against the leader bully

How can someone do so?

Who am I to stand up against?

I guess no one among you are my confidant

Eleonor Roosevelt said,

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”

I guess I am allowing the leader bully to make me feel inferior

So bad

That it is now creeping in my skin

In my thoughts

In my writing

And now in the way I treat the flock

I lied when I say it’s nothing

I hope someone among you will stand for me

At least I’ll know that you are genuine and true

As I am to you


10 thoughts on “Happy Hormone For A Not So Happy Heart

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